I watched Ice Age: Collision course with my fiancée and her 4
1/2-year-old daughter, who asked us about a half-hour into the film,
"When is the movie gonna start?" Funny that I couldn't answer
that question, despite it obviously running for some time, as there
really hadn't been any trace of the main plot to come a full one-third
into the run-time of the movie.
Ice Age: Collision Course represents the fifth film in the
highly lucrative franchise, which, after the last two films in the
series grossed nearly $900 million worldwide apiece, assures there
will be one more go-round. Only modest hits in the United
States, the Ice Age films have enjoyed ravenous success in
many foreign markets, as the mix of colorful characters and heaping
helpings of silly slapstick cross language barriers that stymie many
other Hollywood animated features that rely on a great deal of pop
culture references and in-jokes galore.
What this means, of course, is that Collision Course is
virtually critic proof, as those who already prone to enjoy the series
will already know what they're going to get, for better or worse.
It's a formula film through and through, so after four whole epic
entries, Blue Sky Animation, the makers of this fifth, can rest
assured, knowing that there is likely going to be plenty of people
flocking to see more of these goofy animated animals in silly
slap-happy situations, giving the kiddos plenty of giggles with oodles
of gross juvenile humor and lots of crazy cartoon mayhem.
In this film, the antics of Scrat the squirrel flying a UFO in outer
space, chasing the elusive acorn, ends up inadvertently causing a
massive meteor shower to hit Earth. Manny the wooly mammoth
(Romano, Eulogy) and
his wife Ellie (Latifah, Miracles
from Heaven) forget, for a moment, their fears that their daughter
Peaches (Palmer, Akeelah and the Bee)
will end up leaving them once she gets married to the
silly-natured but loveable Julian (Devine,
Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates). They see the fiery rocks
hurtling in their vicinity and immediately run for cover, along with
their gang of friends (aka The Herd) of many species, eventually
running into the spirited and highly intelligent one-eyed weasel named
Buck (returning from the third film, Dawn of the Dinosaurs),
who concocts a plan to keep the most massive of asteroids from hitting
Earth yet again and wiping them all out. Teamwork is employed,
but they're going to have to stay a step ahead of a trio of
ill-mannered Dino-Birds who want all of these other pesky critters
like the dino-egg saving Buck (Pegg,
Star Trek Beyond) out of the way so they can rule the
roost as the most powerful creatures on the newly destroyed planet.
Like the characters at the heart of this film, the producers of the
Ice Age films soon realize that there's literally nowhere to go
-- we already have squirrels piloting a spacecraft of unknown origin,
so the jokes involving prehistoric shenanigans have completely run out
after the first couple of films. The best they can do is to
keep things always moving, even if it's in circles, and try to live to
see another day, which they will do, as long as butts continue to fill
theater seats around the world.
Kids will enjoy this more than most, as there really isn't much meat
on the bones for most adults to sink their teeth into. There are
occasional clever moments and a few gags to garner a chuckle, but
you're likely to have to actively search for those sparse morsels amid
a cavalcade of Scrat getting maimed trying to stash his acorn in outer
space, and a tired family sitcom subplot featuring yet another
disapproving dad having to learn tolerance for seeing his daughter
growing up and not depending on him anymore.
Ten minutes worth of plot is padded out here to 90+ minutes, which
means that Collision Course has no choice but to add more and
more characters it can to persistently distract us from realizing that
there's not much good in these goods to justify another entry.
Parents who are happy to see their kids laugh and have a good time
will, at best, be tolerant of this movie, but for those actually
looking for a worthwhile way to spend ninety minutes will find that,
like the dinosaurs, the original ideas behind this series went extinct
a long time ago.
Qwipster's rating
:
©2016 Vince Leo
