Perhaps
the biggest appeal of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
films and cartoons is the dose of pop culture spoofing that occurs throughout.
The Ninja Turtles have always been a campy, fun blend of superhero formula
combined with that of martial arts action, and with a colorful assortment of
criminals and the no-plot-is-too-cheesy attitude, kids and juvenile-minded
adults could always count on the Turtles for some lively, escapist action-packed
fare.
Unfortunately, the third and final film in
the original Ninja Turtles big screen series takes away most of what made the
first two films, as well as the cartoon series, fun to watch. Gone is the
setting of the city. Gone are the colorful supporting characters, with no
mention of arch-nemesis Shredder (maybe he finally did die after all).
Gone is the campy fun main plot. Take away pizza parlors, skateboards, and
television and what do you have left? Four talking turtles playing Three
Stooges, Last Samurai-style, in a mostly
serious 17th Century feudal war.
Yes, you heard me, 17th Century -- it's a
time travel movie. Basically, April O'Neil (Turco, "NYPD Blue") discovers
a strange antique that is revealed to be an ancient scepter capable of
transporting someone back in time in exchange for someone from the past coming
forward to the future. April is the first to be exchanged, bringing
forward Kenshin (Hayashi, Pushed to the Limit), a Japanese rebel fighting
to stop his corrupt warlord father, Lord Norinaga (Shimono,
The Big Hit), from gaining weapons from the British
traders that will make them easily defeat any foes they come to battle with.
To save April, the Turtles soon follow, only to find that the locals think them
to be demons, as they are depicted in the artwork on a scroll of ancient legend.
The Turtles are thrust into the middle of the feud, trying to save April, regain
the scepter, and put a squash to Lord Norinaga's plans. Meanwhile, the
vigilante known as Casey Jones (Koteas, Crash)
entertains his newfound Japanese guests while waiting for the Turtles to
return with April.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III
is
a misfire that most fans of anything Turtles agree was the wrong direction for
the film series to take if it wanted a chance to continue. If you're going
to make the mistake of taking the Turtles out of their element and place them in
the past, the very least that should have been done is to make it fun and
adventurous. While the adventure is certainly there, the war is mostly
serious business, with most of the non-Turtle characters playing their roles
straight. The film fails, not just because the Turtles are out of their
element in terms of timeline, but they are also outside of their spoof-y
universe, where only campy things can, and should, ever happen.
It isn't an altogether terrible production,
as there is plenty of decent action, nice sets and costumes, and it's a nice
touch to bring back what was missing from the second film.
such as Elias Koteas as Casey Jones and Corey Feldman (The
'burbs, Stand by Me) to do the voice of
Donatello. They also make Paige Turko's April the spunky spitfire she
wasn't in her first turn. The mechanisms that control the Ninja Turtles'
mouth and facial movements have different in this entry, no longer under the
sure hands of Jim Hensons team. While technically, it is a very impressive
job in recreating human-like movements on human masks, the Furby-like eyes and
teeth that make them look more like grinning Yahoo emoticons than turtles can
make for a disconcerting viewing experience if you've seen the first two films
recently.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III is
only recommended for completist fans of the Turtles and those that are
insatiably curious. Without much of the trademark humor, kitsch factor,
and superhero spoofs that keep the fans giddy with juvenile delight, this entry
not only turned off the fans to any possible future sequels, but did absolutely
nothing to gain new fans. Instead of going back in time, the Turtles
should have been flushed down the toilet to go back to the sewers where they
belong -- and so should this movie.
-- Followed by TMNT
in 2007.
