American Pie: Band Camp (2005) / Comedy

MPAA Rated: R for pervasive crude humor, language, sexuality, and nudity
Running Time: 95 min.

Cast: Tad Hilgenbrinck, Arielle Kebbel, Jason Earles, Tara Killian, Eugene Levy, Chris Owen,
Director: Steve Rash
Screenplay: Brad Riddell
Review published December 24, 2005

Better to call this American Pie: The Next Wave than a sequel, as this one sports an all-new cast, save for small roles for Eugene Levy (The Man, Dumb and Dumberer) and Chris "Sherman-ator" Owen.  If you thought that the American Pie movies were already becoming all about Stifler, Band Camp will do little to dissuade you of this opinion, as he is the star, front and center in nearly every scene.  Let me rephrase that -- it's not Steve Stifler that is the star, it's his younger brother we never heard about, Matt (Hilgenbrinck, in his feature film debut) .  Not that you'd really notice, as he looks and acts just like his older brother in almost every way -- it all smacks of a major rewrite, as it seems almost none of the original cast and crew wanted to sign on for any more movies, and for good reason.  American Pie has gone to crap, almost literally. Forget what I said earlier, American Cow Pie is the right title for this one.

In this film, Stifler gets in trouble after he decides to have some fun by lacing the high school marching band's instruments with pepper spray.  To show him some tolerance for the lowly "bandies", Stifler is forced under penalty of expulsion to attend band camp, where bands from different high schools go and compete for reputation and scholarships. It sucks, but Stifler decides to have a little fun, especially with the cute young girls that are around the camp.  With lots of spy camera equipment at his disposal, he is determined to catch as many of them in a state of undress as possible, but Stifler's fun comes at a price, as the more he gets into trouble, the more points are taken away from his high school's overall score in the competition. 

While most of the original cast is out, the formula is still intact.  Lots of crude humor and sexual innuendo make up the bulk of the humor for the duration, finally shifting over into "sweet" mode toward the end, as it plays out more like a romantic comedy.  Members of the attractive cast are shown in various states of undress, usually involving something embarrassing happening, like getting caught, getting body parts stuck where they don't belong, or imbibing someone else's body fluids accidentally.  Lots of new rock and pop tunes play throughout each scene.  Yes, there is nothing new here save for the less talented cast.

Here's the litmus test:  do you find any of the following funny?  1) Stifler having sex with an oboe and getting stuck in it.  2) Stifler accidentally drinking soda spiked with spit valve saliva.  3) A group of young men applying suntan lotion on their faces made from Stifler's spooge.  4) A marching band all puking their guts out after drinking mass quantities of Ipecac. 

If the answer is yes, then nothing I say should dissuade you from another 90 minutes well spent watching horny teenagers rubbing up against one another, eating human waste, and shooting goo out of every orifice.  All other potential viewers should stay far away, as this entry is easily the worst of the series, and considering I haven't found any of the previous films to be any good, that's saying something.  Strictly for absolute completists, or just people who find the smell of their own flatulence pleasing.

-- Follows the American Pie trilogy: American Pie, American Pie 2, and American Wedding.  Followed by spin-offs, American Pie: The Naked Mile and American Pie Presents: Beta House.

 Qwipster's rating:

©2005 Vince Leo