For a film which gives a sideways swipe to the much maligned
X-Men: The Last Stand by the comment within the film, after some
of the characters are seen walking out a screening of
Return of
the Jedi, that the third film in a series is always the
worst one, it sure takes a lot of cojones to bring out that statement
in the third film in the young X-Men First Class series,
especially one in which it is not only easily the worst in its own
trilogy, but it's also arguably worse than the film it is skewering in
tongue-in-cheek fashion. It's an especially curious swipe when
you consider that the writer of that line, Simon Kinberg, is actually the
screenwriter for both third films, X-Men: The Last Stand and
X-Men Apocalypse.
This entry in the retro X-Men series
finds the mutants in the series-alternate universe year of 1983, ten
years after the events of Days of Future Past,
an age when
the cold war is rampant between the United States and the Soviet
Union, with most people already worried about being on the brink of
annihilation of life on Earth within just a few hours if nuclear war
should ever break out. Erik Lehnsherr, aka Magneto (Fassbender,
Macbeth), is living as a
closeted mutant to keep his family safe, laboring as a metal worker in
Poland with a loving wife and daughter. Professor Charles Xavier (McAvoy,
Victor Frankenstein)
is at
the mansion that serves as the School for Gifted Youngsters (aka,
a place for mutants confronting who they are and learning to control their
powers). Both have their home worlds rocked in tragedy that cause them
to come out of their comfortable jobs. Meanwhile, Mystique (Lawrence,
Joy) spends her time traveling to the four corners of the Earth in order to
liberate mutants wherever she can, such as the German teleporter,
Nightcrawler (Smit-McPhee, Slow West).
The mutants begin to fight amongst each other yet again when the
world's first mutant, the powers-absorbing En Sabah Nur (Isaac,
The Force Awakens), aka
Apocalypse, is resurrected from his dormant state, essentially
imprisoned underground since 3600 B.C., after which he wastes no time in hatching a plan to lay conquest to the entire
planet. He sets about pulling together powerful mutant
accomplices, dubbed his Four Horsemen, in an effort to bring humanity
under his rule, effectively threatening them with nuclear annihilation,
using their own weapons against them.
Now it's up to Xavier, Mystique, Beast (Hoult,
Mad Max: Fury Road), and a band of untested gifted
students to fight for the right of humans, people who want mutant-kind
destroyed, from being crushed under the rule of these mad
powermongers.
As with four of the six core X-Men films to come out thus far,
Apocalypse is directed by Bryan Singer, who has seemingly done
little wrong thus far, He finally hits a creative wall in this latest
outing. It's not that it is entirely his fault, as Apocalypse
finds its stride early and we see some good work by the helmer in
setting up some of the supporting characters that will play a larger
role toward the climax later in the film. The main problem comes
when the character of Apocalypse, whom we're introduced to in a short
opening summation of his origins in the age of Ancient Egypt, emerges into the realm of
the 1980s, where he learns everything that has happened in the last
five millennia by absorbing television broadcasts (no joke). Though he
is as powerful as they come, Apocalypse lacks interesting qualities as
a bud guy other than his ability to do pretty much anything he sets
his mind to do, not too far removed from Imhotep from Stephen Sommers
The Mummy series. His use in the film is to serve
mostly as an excuse to showcase destruction or well-known terrestrial
landmarks and landscapes on a massive scale, while the Four Horsemen
are converted to his cronies with minimal rationale, shoehorned in to
make for instant adversaries, and to give instant introductions for barely developed
characters younger versions of Storm (Shipp,
Straight Outta Compton), Cyclops
(Sheridan, Scouts Guide to the Zombie
Apocalypse), Angel (Hardy), Psylocke (Munn,
Ride Along 2) and Jean Grey
(Turner, "Game of Thrones") to, presumably, utilize in future films.
The best scene in the prior film, Days of Future Past, gets
somewhat recreated here in Apocalypse, this time another
lengthy music video montage in which Quicksilver (Peters, is in speed mode
while the world around him is in slow motion, set to the Eurythmics
"Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)". It's still great eye candy, but its
regurgitated nature makes it feel like obligatory fan service this
time around, rather than a wholly pleasant surprise. There are
attempts at quieter moments, such as Professor Xavier's attempt to
reconnect with an ex-love that he's wiped the memories of, CIA agent
Moira MacTaggart, but they also fail to compel through the sense of
superficiality that has largely permeated the series thus far.
This series had once set itself apart through subversive social
metaphors for such things as sexuality and equality, but this entry
mostly pushes such notions aside for lots of superhero flexing and
posturing in front of green-screen backgrounds of buildings crumbling
into rubble.
As for the rest of the movie, it's overblown, overly violent, and
largely without choice comic relief (save for the Last Stand
dis that boomerangs) or particularly revelatory thematic
subtext, which is a shame given that the early 1980s setting is rife
for truly funny pop culture references and a wealth of historical
importance. So where is the fun or gravitas? In their
place we have monotony and plot points that dart around with little
expository effort to hold them all together. It's a shame that
Singer didn't wrangle more screenwriters than Kinberg, whose prior
work, Fantastic Four, represents about the worst the
blockbuster superhero genre has had to offer in some time. Such
a shame for the series to fall apart so swiftly and spectacularly
after such a great run, and so early in the film too, especially as
they've decided to go so big with the scope of X-Men Apocalypse
that the series will be challenged to deliver any bigger. That's
OK, though, If not bigger, I'll settle for merely better, because this entry
represents the kind of bloated and brain-dead spectacle-first
mentality that Singer and company have been so successful at avoiding
all along.
-- There is a small scene after the credits.
Qwipster's rating
:
©2016 Vince Leo
